Lost

Although this is the title of one of my favorite shows, it simply describes how I feel lately.

As you all know, we have gone through a lot of changes recently. I think the straw that has broken my back is the death of my father.

We all knew it was inevitable as he has been fighting a losing battle with cancer the last 3 years. However, as much as you think you are prepared for it, NOTHING can prepare you for the mix of emotions that reek havoc with your life.

I try to function for the sake of my children, but I just can't seem to get going. I have a baby due in 8 weeks and I have no gumption to prepare a crib, wash up clothes or to even shop. I have no desire to explore our new surroundings here in Eugene.

I am lost and as I sit and ponder who will find me, I realize that now is the time to strengthen my relationship with the Savior, with my family and to finally become my own best friend.